Tag: confidence

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Dating 101 – 5 dating basics. Part V – Calling The Next Day

Call her - dating adviceThis is the final part of Dating 101 – 5 dating basics. This time we are talking about calling the next day. Basically, the only reason for not calling next day is if the date was abruptly ended for some reason – like you call her “stupid bitch” or she calling you a “racist asshole”. If you parted on good terms – there is no reason for not calling.

The outcome of the date can be expressed in binary terms – either zero or one, TRUE or FALSE. In simple words – do you want a second date – yes or no? If yes – call her and say so. If no – call her, thank her and don’t ask for a second date. This is still a part of the routine to build your self-confidence and be a gentleman. So even if you won’t see her anymore – you have no idea who she might talk to. And believe me, there’s a difference for that hot chick with firm body you’ll have a chance to talk to next month – if her friend would say her date with you was “interesting, but we just didn’t click” or if she would say “he’s a schmuck who didn’t even call me next day to say thank you”. We all know the value of a good reference. This is the occasion to value it even more.

Since this is the last part of the Dating 101, let me venture on a little personal story path. There was this cute girl I went out once but we didn’t really click. Although the intellectual level was certainly there, the emotional wasn’t quite on par with what I was looking for. We had quite a good time at City Crab restaurant, waitress was certainly sure that we were heading straight for that Big Day, but – it just didn’t work. What happened next was something I would expect from a plot of a porn movie, not from my date.

Next day, when I called her, she said she felt that we didn’t quite connect emotionally. She said it was her fault. She said she didn’t want to go into that too deep, but there is this guy she feels attached to. He went on a long trip to Alaska. She’s not sure if they split for good or not. That’s okay, I said. Then she said that she really liked me and my attitude and behavior. And that she had this friend, who broke up with her boyfriend couple of months ago and is looking to start something serious. And while she herself is not really available she can pass my phone number to that friend and she will call me. She’s a nice girl, into dancing and theater, works in some major financial company, very sweet person.

To say that I was amazed is to underwhelm the situation. Dream come true. Call her the next day. You never know.

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Dating 101 – 5 dating basics. Part I – Self-Confidence

Build your confidence - DontDateGuy.comYesterday I went over five basic things for dating that most guys tend to overlook. Starting this day I want to elaborate on each topic so that you’ll get the whole picture as clear as possible. Besides, it never hurts to reiterate important stuff, if guys keep forgetting about it.

Today we will talk about self-confidence. Of course, if you think you are the center of the universe you need to be reading a list of psychiatric clinics instead of this blog, but I’m sure that’s not the case. We’re talking regular folk here.

Don’t blabber about yourself too much. Even if she asks – answer should be short yet concise. Don’t boast about recent promotion yet, couple of dates later it might be a better idea. Same goes for your office and money you are making. If this is all you can bring to the table – she might think about next guy who makes more money then you. Remember, there’s always a bigger fish in the ocean.

Don’t brag on the brands you’re wearing. You will most likely alienate your date (unless she’s a gold digger and just looking for some financial support) if you will drone about your watch, your suit or your car. Most ladies know only three main car brands (those are BMW, Lexus and Mercedes) and you will have hard time and a stupid look on your face trying to explain why your car is better. Besides, it just tells her that you will not care about her more then you care about your car. And this is not the impression you’re going after.

Discussion of your former encounters must be absolutely forbidden. Keep that as far away from conversation as possible. Just don’t go there, trust me – you will never impress a woman if you mention that you had “multiple affairs”. If she strongly insists – the only allowed topic is your last relationship. Most likely she will want to know when did it end (it DID end, right?) and on what terms. Be prepared with a story as close to the truth as possible, but don’t put yourself in a bad light. After all you want her to be your next relationship and she wants to be sure you are the “good guy”. So give her something, but save juicy details for later, when she already past the point of checking references. It’s hard to suggest what to say, but outright lying is the worst you can do. From my experience (and my sources confirm that) if you say something like “we had issues and misunderstandings, I did what I could to save the relationship, but, unfortunately, failed” (in your own words, of course) could score you more brownie points then saying “she was a stupid arrogant bitch“. If she was that bad – how come you ended up with her for so long?

Unfortunately, there is no sure-fire way of telling how to be self-confident with a woman. If you know it already – you hardly need any advice at all, because that’s what chicks dig the most. Ever thought why cute girls end up with biggest assholes? Because those guys have a lot of self-confidence which ladies love to see in men. As my sources tell me – the self-confident man usually doesn’t talk much, but acts in a certain way that allows lady to identify him as a “worthy man”.

Another piece of free dating advice. Even if you fail to impress a girl and after a date or two she said that she doesn’t want to go on – do an “exit interview”. Ask what you did wrong, since this will allow you to fix your issues and don’t make same mistake again in a future. Plus, this little trick will add another extra to your self-esteem.