Christmas Story – A Second Date

Christmas Story - A Second Date - Dont Date Guy Blog (This is part 3. Click here for Part 2 or here for Part 1)

Next day (I was told it was Tuesday, since this couple had their first date on Monday, no less) brought some sort of sobering to the guy. The more he thought about last night date the more he realized that it was too good to be true indeed. He was, however, going to call that girl anyway – at around 1pm, lunch time, – just to make sure he shouldn’t be making any more plans about that fabulous chick. This lasted until about 11:55 am when his phone rang (vibrated, actually) and – there she was.

She didn’t forget to thank him for the date first. Then, immediately after that she started telling him about how important it is to trust a person you’re getting involved with, then something about forces of nature and so on. From 45 minutes of talking he only had a chance to speak for about 45 seconds. He was, however, kind of impressed by how passionately the girl was talking about it. If nothing else, it felt like she went through a lot and is just trying to make sure she won’t have to go through it again. They had a pleasant chit-chat saying good-byes though. Each promised to call each other tomorrow.

Next day, she got to call him first – again! He started suspecting something, but she charged ahead with the question is he a good cameraman and if he owns a video camera. He responded that he knows they exist, but he’s trying to familiarize himself with photo equipment first. She said it’s a damn shame, she wanted to shoot a porn movie tonight and they didn’t have a camera man. She suggested putting a few feathers in various places to play cowboys and Indians under the blankets, to spice up things.

When laughter ended, she said she obviously called to check if he has a sense of humor. He promised to show her the size of it on a third date if she has any plans for a second one. She replied that she just might. They talked about something else for about an hour (I wasn’t really taking notes when the guy described – word for word – what they did talk about), and ended up setting a second date up on Thursday night. Tentatively, so far, to be confirmed tomorrow.

Tomorrow came, the date got confirmed. He was to pick her up at about 11pm to go to some club. Now, to side step the story a little, I have to tell you that this guy has never been to a club – ever! So when he subscribed to go – he just hadn’t had any idea what he was getting himself into. Plain and simple – he was flying right into the eye of a disaster. But he went all in and said yes to that. On the other hand – I would also be very very hesitant to say no to someone with 36 DDD bra and 25 inch waistline.

Around 9pm it suddenly occured to him that it would be nice to grab a flower bouquet and something extra. Sure, she would only see it for about a minute or two before leaving, but! He messes up something at the club, she gets home upset, sees the flowers and fruits and (maybe) forgives him. Or so the thought goes. He went to a store nearby, bought some flowers and composed a bouquet himself – yellow and peach roses, green leaves, nice and simple. He also grabbed a few bags of fruits – peaches, apples, tangerines.

11:05pm he calls – she doesn’t pick up the phone. In fact – calls went straight to voicemail, which meant the phone is turned off! 11:15pm – phone is still off. 11:30pm – off. 11:55pm – off. 12:20am – off. 12:42am – she calls him! Not even knowing what to think now, he tells her very dryly that he needs to drop off something to her and be gone, as there will be obviously no date today. He drives to her house, brings her flowers and fruits (less a few apples he chewed on while calling her) and trying to leave. She comes up with story that her close friend had died a week ago and they only told her this evening, she cried and fell asleep only to wake up at 12:30am and realized she stood him up. Not believing a single word she said he gives her a chance to make it up tomorrow. She says she’ll be more than happy to, because she feels bad. After another 45 minutes or so talking and gentle hugging they’ve parted.

(To be continued)

Dating 101 – 5 dating basics. Part IV – Being A Gentleman

Lady and GentlemanIt is really hard to elaborate on how to be a gentleman. It’s rather easy to say what NOT to do. Don’t be an asshole. Don’t offend her. Don’t make sexual advances too early. Don’t tell her how good you are. Don’t brag about yourself. Oh, and constantly checking out how you look in a mirror is probably a bad idea too.

A lot of women complain that guys are so chatty about themselves on a first date, that it makes it next to impossible to interrupt such monologues. The key to a successful date is two-way communication, so both of you must speak out. Don’t get too inquisitive, but be naturally interested. The idea behind first date is to see if you physically attracted to each other, if you have anything in common to talk about and if there is any spark or chemistry between the two of you. Basically – do you want to see that person again? Would you be interested in talking to her (or him)? Would you want to “go all the way” – not because you want to stick it into everything that moves, but because you naturally want this specific woman?

Being a gentleman is a good thing for various reasons. Not last one of them is self-respect. You wouldn’t abuse a date by telling her something nasty, impolite – even if she fully deserves it. Just finish the date, get her home (or whatever your parting arrangements are) and move on. Don’t stop to say that her ass takes up whole driveway – even if it does. Believe me, you’ll feel better about yourself and that will lead you to getting a better date tomorrow.

Another reason for being a gentleman is that girls TALK! You never know who your last date knows – maybe she knows someone who’s a friend of your next crush. And her talking can make a huge difference with your new upcoming affair. So be careful what you say and don’t be a schmuck.

Being a gentleman also means telling no lies. Of course everyone wants to look better then they are – that’s why silicon implants got invented! However, there are two problems with lies – a) they get uncovered, and b) they get uncovered at the most inconvenient time possible. That is why I personally try not to BS my date. If she will be interested in me – lies can kill that in a single stroke. If she’s not interested in me because my car isn’t hot enough – I am not in her market anyway.

Last, but not least – being a gentleman also means getting out of your way to please. Women like attention, they have this special gland or something that measures men’s attention to her down to tiniest bits. So if you think she’s the woman you want – please that gland today like there is no tomorrow. That’s the only way to make sure that tomorrow will come.

And it just might belong to you!

First date poll

What is the first three things you notice in your date when you first see her?

Mine is:

  • hair and face features – face it, that’s the place you will be looking at for a good deal of time, so it is important;
  • body shape (I am very much a breast man, so the shape is, indeed, important);
  • articulation and body language – tells you a lot if you know what to look for (more on that later)

Don’t be afraid to elaborate in comments